Personal Account: Why I believe one should one love Jesus and God ..... a gentle Bible Bashing

Dia dhuit, God be with you,
 These blog entries are not short, they are chapters, and most were originally intended to be part of a book, I'm constantly updating even old blog entries so apologies if this is not for you. I am diagnosed as schitzofrenic with hypomanic episodes, I consider my experiences as Shamanic & Spiritual as no doubt Jesus's experiences were, even if he could be in my opinion is actual Son of God. I also had Faerie/Leperachaun & arguably Satanic attacks. I'm still making sense of them. The rest of this post is spoken from a slightly brainwashed christian viewpoint which I still basically believe even if I'm not practicing as in as much of a hyperreligious way and beating myself up every time I sin which is greatly relieving my mental illness from a symtomatic point of view in the short term at least, I might go to Hell for my neglect but being a major sinner from a Catholic viewpoint I'm doing less Bible bashing and Jesus did say before removing the splinter (sin) from your neighbours eye remove the Beam from your own. Only God can judge the heart of man. So now we proceed to the Bible bashing written in 2017 hopefully my opinions will enlighten you.

Jesus died a horrible death for our sins & God the Father left his son do this. Anyone who doesn't appreciate that someone who loved you died for you most litely doesn't deserve Heaven, and, is a murderer at heart. The video below will give you some idea Jesus suffered it's called Stigmata 1989. Initially after watching this I did not feel guilt for Jesus dying for my sins and the story of the passion of Christ in the Bible does little to move me. I've heard the story too often and am immune to it.


However, I had a severe wake up call, I was working in Brussels, 40th birthday organised, a friend came over he was agnostic and suffering a bit of a hangover. I was a bipolar high and wanting to give him a religious wake up call. I played the following Holy and terrifying video to him, Stigmata 1989.

He said stop showing me that freaky shit, I stormed out of the apartment & proceeded to walk to Brussels city centre. I was quite content I cared about Jesus dying for my sins, I didn't really, I heard out of tune angels singing near a city centre train station. I became overcome with emotions which were not mine, of about the intensity of how distraught St. Peter would have been witnessing Jesus dying.

I felt dirty, I gave away my iPhone, took off my shirt shoes and socks on the Streets of Brussels and thought I was going to be spending the rest of my life on the Streets of Brussels as a tramp hoping I would somehow repay Jesus for my Sins and his horrible death dying for me.

A Police car stopped me, the shopkeepers on the Street must have pointed out this guy isn't dealing with a full Deck. After our short chat, they decided to take me to Psychiatric Hospital for evaluation. I was thinking thanks be to God. I was in Psychiatric Hospital for my 40th birthday, nobody came except my Sister. Thanks Margo.

We all hear of thousands of people in some poor country dying everyday from simple causes & usually do nothing about it, we are scum. 

Bill Gates allegedly whom I used admire as I'm an ambitious unemployed software developer & also a Richard Feynman fan, in 2016 Bill was found to be giving vaccines to Africans had abortion drugs mixed in. Bill is no longer allowed to give vaccines to Indians through The Gates foundation to India as they we known to be experimental and dangerous and he was using the Indian poor as guinea pigs Because he is rich he will possibly get away with this evil.

Like most people,unfortunately, I'm cold hearted in some ways, I personally didn't grieve on September 11th rich educated Wall Street Bankers are not more important than poor people they just think they are.

You say I never asked him to die for you. There are currently 173000 search hits for Near Death Experience Hell on YouTube. Bill Larkin is enough to watch he has only 1700 watches for his excellent video below, he deserves more.

If you want more check out Bill Weise's story and ask yourself do you really want to go there. Mary Baxter's video is much more graphic.

God/Mother Nature is Almighty but I personally believe he can't hold the Universe in a pristine state if we Sin we are part of the Body of Christ and if you are a hand damaging and maiming the rest of the body God has to cut you off ultimately if one won't repent & behave to keep the rest of the body healthy. Admittedly Jesus has rescued people from the beginnings of Hell.

People typically pay over 150 euro for a Bruce Springsteen ticket and all he ever
did is sing dance and smile, he does this for himself. I was on stage a few times
with a band and it was better than sex when we played well.

All Superman did to save Lois is disobey his father, travel faster than
light going around the Earth to go back in time to save Lois, Jesus died a horrible death and went to Hell for 3 days for us and a lot of people don't give him a second thought & most people tell us to fuck off when us bible bashers
suggest that he wants us to trust & love him & do our best not to sin which is
in our best interest anyway, he is the coolest friend ever, Buddah was only interested in his own calm people adore Krishna cos he looked good ( admittedly
I know little about Krishna ), Allah is a distant untouchable God offering sex with virgins to voilent Martyrs.

There are basically two Religions Love and Fear/Hate. Sin causes Death and Decay I've personally been shown that it's Quantum Mechanical & how my Drinking and Lust have caused bad things to happen to myself & other people.

As an example of Quantum Mechanical misfortune being the consequence of sin
Here is a story Bathsheba was the wife of Uriah the Hittite, and later of King David by whom she gave birth to Solomon, who succeeded David as king.

David's  while walking on the roof of his palace, saw Bathsheba, who was then the wife of Uriah, having a bath. He immediately desired her and later made her pregnant. The text in the Bible does not explicitly state as to whether Bathsheba consented to sex or not.

In an effort to conceal his sin, David summoned Uriah from the army (with whom he was on campaign) in the hope that Uriah would re-consummate his marriage and think that the child was his. But Uriah was unwilling to violate the ancient kingdom rule applying to warriors in active service.Rather than go home to his own bed, he preferred to remain with the palace troops.
After repeated efforts to convince Uriah to have sex with Bathsheba, the king gave the order to his general, Joab, that Uriah should be placed on the front lines of the battle, where Uriah would be more likely to die. David had Uriah himself carry the message that led to his death. After Uriah has been killed, David married Bathsheba.
David's action was displeasing to the Lord, who sent Nathan the prophet to reprove the king.

Below is the consequences of the sin

2 Samuel 24:11-17 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)

David’s Punishment

11 When David got up in the morning, a revelation from the Lord had come to the prophet Gad, David’s seer: 12 “Go and say to David, ‘This is what the Lord says: I am offering you three choices. Choose one of them, and I will do it to you.’”
13 So Gad went to David, told him the choices, and asked him, “Do you want three years of famine to come on your land, to flee from your foes three months while they pursue you, or to have a plague in your land three days? Now, think it over and decide what answer I should take back to the One who sent me.”
14 David answered Gad, “I have great anxiety. Please, let us fall into the Lord’s hands because His mercies are great, but don’t let me fall into human hands.”
15 So the Lord sent a plague on Israel from that morning until the appointed time, and from Dan to Beer-sheba 70,000 men died. 16 Then the angel extended his hand toward Jerusalem to destroy it, but the Lord relented concerning the destruction and said to the angel who was destroying the people, “Enough, withdraw your hand now!” The angel of the Lord was then at the threshing floor of Arauna the Jebusite.
17 When David saw the angel striking the people, he said to the Lord, “Look, I am the one who has sinned; I am the one who has done wrong. But these sheep, what have they done? Please, let Your hand be against me and my father’s family.”

As another example of this from modern day Abrahamic Law usage circumcision reduces the chance of spread of HIV between people by 50% this was found out because AIDS was rife in one town in Africa while a nearby town had a lot less. The Jews get benefits for obeying Gods laws which on the face of it seem quite silly.

Also the HPV vaccine which prevents Genital Warts & ultimately Cervical  Cancer on promiscous people has terrible side effects for a small percentage of young women who get it, this I believe is because the vaccine promotes promiscuity it Goes against Gods laws. The sooner the athiests realise that Statistics only work when the observation is done in quantum physics terminology collapsing the wavefunction & God doesn't like being put to the test & the Universe behaves utterly differently when not observed as Einstein put it "who can say if the Moon exists when nobody is looking at it", medicine based on Statistics is at can be misleading at times despite what Big Pharma, the HSE in Ireland, and Florence Nightengale said if God has different plans.  Quoting a friend Nora about the HPV Vaccine "All I know is that this vaccine is particularly nasty. 18 girls died during the clinical trials and the greedy pharmaceuticals still chose to push out this vaccine. Even in Ireland, there are hundreds of girls that have had adverse effects from the HPV vaccine and the HSE still continue to roll it out saying it is safe and effective (the usual vaccine rhetoric) Its on the cards for young boys also. Checkout for an account of the Irish girls whose health has been sent seriously compromised by the HPV vaccine. I trust Patrick Holford's findings."
On a more personal and ridiculous example I interpreted as a sign was when Gay Marriage was legalised in Ireland Syrians were fleeing ISIS in leaky boats to the island of Lesbos/Lesbians. 'The best flirt I ever got was from a lesbian whose close relative died who I'm fairly sure is in heaven at the time and she immediately got married to her partner. 

Deutoronomy 10:18 in the Bible says don't interpret Omens, but God leaves cosmic coincidences around to show he was here & he has a sense of humour. We can always work backwards but very rarely forward, for instance, this happened on September 11 2001, when the Twin Towers came down.

Also, a few people coincidently died when I drink alcohol after God giving me a sign of structural damage caused to my house in Anger when I rebelled .I'm not telling you who or why I'm too embarrassed but it scared the crap out of me, in short I think I could be spending some of my afterlife as a Banshee. I'm doing my best to stop drinking because the wages of sin is death.

My Bio, The Nerds Survival Guide Summary

I'm D.J. Barrow a Farmers son from North Cork and used be a very successful computer programmer, my brother is doing a good job of running the farm now. I had a weakness for attractive women & the only attention I ever got in any abundance was from Strippers, I became addicted wasted a fortune. I believe I had a minor death experience showing off on a Stripper Pole in a Disco Hopped my head off the pole upside down.

I heard a crack, & said to myself "This didn't hurt like this before", fell from the pole unconscious, and covered the butt of my Chinos in dirt.

I Woke up the following morning laughing my head off with no idea how I got home a cut where my Third Eye ( an Indian Chakra google it ) in my forehead should be it took 30 minutes with a nailbrush and Wipp Express to clean the dirt off my pants.

Two days later a beautiful young lady the image of Audrey Hephburn half the size of me psychologically hammered the crap out of me in Karate after me laughing at her, she got mean,I cried "Oh Dear God!" I ran backwards from her at 15 miles an hour. She was one of the few woman who ever got my total respect she was amazing. I would have done anything she asked without expectation of a repayment, she was boss!
A picture of a Wall taken in Medugorje ( Virgin Mary )

Both Pretty Determined Ladies.

After getting my Third Eye opened or Brain Damaged due to Drink or the bang on the Head or both I was gradually getting more desperate for women and my work suffered

There was a pretty Stripper White Witch in one of the Strip Clubs and I had  a mental breakdown in 2004 one night in a Club, I heard out of tune angelic bells. The Strippers were Players, I was an Educated Fool and I wasn't having any kind of meaningful relationship with any of them despite all the money I was wasting.

I gradually got more agressive and abusive & I believe 3 Angry Guardian Angels sent by my Mother dressed as German Police carried me off to psychiatric hospital. My old nice neighbours were also getting fed up of me exercising in the apartment late at night.

Today Oct 2017 I am still on drugs to control my mental illness but thankfully I have not had to go to Psychiatric Hospital in 2.5 years.

I received a text in 2006 sent from myself 15 minutes before I woke up it said "Come on In, Follow Road", I spotted this in Spancil Hill Horse Fair. I believe this was God telling me that the wide road leads to hell and I should  follow the narrow road, although a friend was convinced I sent it to myself while sleepwalking. My father died quickly the following year after getting a Brain Haemorrage at Goersbridge Horse Fair. He was on a blood thinner called Warfin which is the same chemically as Rat Poison. The following month there was an article in the Irish Examiner saying that as much as sneezing on Warfin can cause a Brain Haemorrage. There is a Gypsy/Tinker aspect to Horse Fairs which gives a "Caused by the Faeries feel to my experiences". This was the beginning of the utter change in my worldview as I've seen a lot of weird stuff which athiests don't like to talk about since my first breakdown. I believe I in some way died once after my breakdown and Jesus have Sheepdog Angels, Faeries and allows Demons to get involved if I misbehave after this Sheep trying to herd me against my will into a lovely Pen is a meadow called Heaven almost against my will and bring as many people as I can be evangelising the love of Jesus who has only our best interests at heart.

The rest of these blogs are the most interesting things I know about and I want to let you all into the secrets of God and the Universe as Richard Feynman did with his fantastic Lectures on Physics which is lacking bits on the God part because the Richard lost faith in God when his wife died of Tubercolosis.

This blog is an poor attempt to balance Feynmans Lectures with the bit about God that Feynman left out which Youtube, sleeping with the Christian TV channels on 10 hours a day, reading a bit about other Religions in the Library and chatting with friends, Lifehacker and Facebook lead me to write.

Thanks Caltech and Michael Gottleib for making the books Physics books available online. It is my hope that will be thought in High School in 20 years time when budding Star Trek Scotties will be getting the Inertial Dampers working along with the Anti Matter Containment Field so essential to the Starship Enterprise running at 97% efficency.

Slan, God Bless,

One more thing, below, is a testimony of a religious hero of mine, Heidi Baker, from Sid Roths it's SuperNatural show see where a little faith & trust in Jesus can get you   enjoy :) !


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